Finding Balance…
As I have stated many times in the past, I often struggle with finding balance in my life. If I spend too much time on the computer, I feel like I am neglecting my kiddos and my hubby and vice-versa. With the holidays approaching and all the hot deals that are likely to surface, I know I will feel even more pressure to hang out with my computer way too frequently. And it seems that I am not alone. Check out this email that I recently received from a reader…
I love to save money and get excited on many of the deals you post. However, recently I feel like I am married to my computer, coupon book and your site :).
I have let my home duties get behind and I am always checking in on your site. I also love to read what others say as I learn so much and also love to offer replies on questions others may have – as I know how much others have helped me learn –plus, there are times I am corrected and I actually am thankful I was, it’s another learning experience –better at home then in the store with that cranky cashier.
So, now I sit here wondering – is it ok to take a break or will I go through couponing withdrawal? Will it be hard to get caught up? How long of a break to take?
I get Sunday papers delivered, so I won’t be behind on my inserts. I am just so exhausted of separating, cutting, sorting, planning, – and getting to the stores early and making sure I do not forget to cash in rain checks on time and before the expiration date of my matching coupons.
Coupon shopping is weekly and never ending it seems. I recently had to buy quite a bit of food without coupons to get restocked on some things I let get behind. And, it made me think – oh no! My husband is upset that we ran out of such and such and the cupboards are not full and so now I had to pay full price. So, I am adding my weekly shopping food coupon shopping trips back into my schedule.
But, I am only one person and my kids are too young to help and I do not spend nearly any time with them like I should. I am luckily to clean the house, cook meals, do laundry, organize the budget, plan out appointments for the family and get them there, so on, so forth. My husband works (long days: approx 60-70 hours a week, 5 days) and I do everything else – a 24/7 job that doesn’t include a full nights rest, thanks to my little baby girl who still doesn’t sleep through the night. Between my toddler and now 9 month old – it’s been 22 months so far and not one night have I slept through a night yet.
I like to think I am a typical SAHM who is married with a few kids and a couple pets. So, what are your thoughts? What do you hear from others on this?
With that being said, how do all of you find that perfect balance (or is there even such a thing)?! Do you ever feel overwhelmed with couponing and deals? Do you ever want to go into a grocery store, leave your coupon binder behind and purchase everything at full-price just to take a break? If you have taken a break from couponing, how long of a break did you take and did you come back feeling refreshed? Feel free to answer any or all of these questions and share any additional tips that you may have.
it made me want to take your reader on as a daughter and help her with all her chores, shopping and worries..
Bless you dear.. I hope someone helps you out..
Couponing shouldn’t be guilt ridden,, just empowering,, if it’s too much,, just do what you can do.. and if your hubby works that many hours… bless him too… and just spend the extra to save your sanity!!!
Your kids are only yours for a few years and then they become an adult and become your friend as they move on with their lives. The question is “Will saving a dollar today be worth more then than the memory of their laughter tomorrow. My suggestion, hire a teenager, not to babysit, but to clip coupons or whatever you need done while you spend time with your child. Make time for them now because you can never get that back. Your not a SAHM your a Work at home mom. So the balance is realizing whats worth saving money on, food, shampoo or your time. Use some of the money you save to pay for whats really valuable, time with your kids, you can get another coupon tomorrw, but never another memory. I’m a grandmother who sacrificed material advantages to be home for my children and don’t regret a moment,
I do all of these things and work full time outside the home. My husband too works crazy hours. Not making it a contest between SAHM and working moms, but imagine having all the house duties that begin after a full day at the office. Appreciate the choice you made. There is no perfect choice for anyone and the grass is always greener. I am not trying to be rude but I walked in the door at 4:00, have the same dinner and homework issues as you, same sleepless nights, but also have to cram in everything you did during the day in a few short evening hours. Someone always has it worse.
amen, sista!
Here here! Full time worker, and ALL the jobs of a stay at home mom!! Cooking, cleaning, shopping, etc. I make sure that ALL of my couponing is done in the wee hours of the night after I’ve spent time with my 16 month old (bed at 7) and hubby (falls asleep on the couch!) 😉 Never put family before couponing, and it’s definitely hard out there—just learn to love the situation you have
Very true. Except for 9 hours a day I don’t take care of my children. Let’s not under estimate each other. SAHM take on all kinds of other work too. It’s not just taking care of the kids and the house. Don’t compare, just appreciate what the other has to bring to the world. 🙂
I appreciate where you are coming from, but its not like SAHMs sit around and do housework all day long. Truely, most of the day is spent taking care of the children—which you pay someone else to do. That is completely fine and a choice you make, but please don’t make it sound as if SAHMs have tons of “time” to do housework because the reality is that they are caring for children most, if not all, of the day. This is their “job” and they still have the nightly chores working moms do.
I’m sorry, but no reasonable person is going to argue that you have an equal amount of time to do housework being a SAHM versus being a working mom. Now, let me preface this with the fact that I *know* being a SAHM is tons of work, and that caring for children is a lot more work and responsibility than a traditional desk job. I also think SAHMs are important and that children should not be separated from their mothers unless it’s absolutely necessary. I also think SAHMs are underappreciated in our culture. HOWEVER, you can simply not argue that SAHMs and working moms have the same struggles with time issues and housework. It makes no logical sense. Yes, caring for children takes the majority of your time during the day. No, you are not sitting around and watching soaps (lol). BUT, if your child is occupying his/herself for even a 10 min period, you can throw some clothes in the washer. Working moms don’t have that 10 min. If your child naps, you can get a thing or two done (or maybe you just want to take a break- that’s fine, too). If your child/ren are old enough, they can help you mix things in the kitchen for dinner. Trust me, it’s different.
I understand that maybe you feel attacked, or feel that this is turning into a SAHM/WOHM debate…it’s not. But please don’t make arguments that are just simply illogical.
Oh, BTW, I had a short opportunity to be a SAHM. I worked full time outside the home for a very short period. I now work PT evenings. So I know what I’m talking about. I’m soooo grateful that I only work evenings PT, now! I pretty much get to be a SAHM 3 days a week, and a SAHM during the day 4 days a week. I do still get overwelmed, but housework and cooking are nothing compared to working FT!!
By housework and cooking are nothing, I mean housework and cooking are easier to do now that I only work PT than they were when I was working FT and trying to do them! Housework and cooking and child-rearing are always a lot of work!!
I respectuflly disagree with you there. SAHM’s have it tough, particularly b/c there are people at home all day messing up the house. Working parents, where the kids are gone all day at daycare only have after work for their house to get all messed up. Not quite equal, but it’s opinion based. To each their own.
Such negativity. Isn’t it better just to support each other for the mom’s that we are and respect each other’s choices?
Such negativity. Isn’t it better just to support each other for the moms that we are and respect each others’ choices?
Ok I just gotta set this right. I used to be a working mom. I would work 70 hours a week, do all the household work and all the other duties of a mommy. But for the past 1.5 years I have been a stay at home mom because I wanted to see if it was for me. And let me just tell you RIGHT NOW Being a stay at home mom is the HARDEST thing I have EVER done. It is SO MUCH more demanding than working. I can’t even begin to tell you. There are certainly challenges with each situation, but I can tell you from my experience that being a stay at home mom is so much harder than working 70 hours a week managing a company. LOL now I feel like work would be a break! Just sayin yall, don’t compare unless you have experienced each situation!
I think you are just trading one stress for another. Being home FT is alot of work…the stresses are just different than the stresses of working. That being said, working FT is hard work too.
Anywho, I took a break for couponing. I am just too busy with my kids and this is what had to give. I am thankful for the stockpile I have built up. I have a while before I really *need* alot of personal care items and some non perishable food things.
I have 4 kids young teen to baby. I am a professional and work long hours. I am a single parent. Ex does not assist me. I pay for everything. One child has disabilities and I have some health issues. I have lots of medical bills and my salary pays for it. No one comes into my home and helps me except my family on occasion. I take care of my kids and couponing helps us have extras. I try to keep a positive attitude and do the best I can. I keep my kids on a schedule and run a tight ship. I spend time with the kids as they are my priority. I have to work because I have 4 kids to take care of and medical bills to pay. I am able to stay home with the kids in the summer so at that time consider myself a stay at home mom. I don’t debate as to which job is harder stay at home or working mom because every body’s circumstances are different. I lose sleep because I clean house, pay bills, get ready for the next day after kids go to sleep. I also sometimes bring work home to catch up on and do it when the kids are asleep. I take my kids to soccer, church, church activities, MD appts, therapy, etc. etc. Until you have been a single working parent I don’t believe anyone knows how it is “doing it all.” I don’t want to compare my family life to others because I don’t know how other families live. I know for me life is very, very busy and I work really, really hard to provide for my family. The time I get to stay home with my kids I cherish but I also try to do for them all the things I would do if I stayed at home full time. I also try to do a good job at my profession. I am proud of that part of my life too. My only guilt is that I wish I could give my child with disabilities more of my time and had more income to provide more care for her but I don’t dwell on it.
My advice to stay at home or working moms is enjoy your life as it is. Enjoy your kids, enjoy whatever your lot is. My life is super busy but I have 4 wonderful kids and a great job to support them and the motivation to take care of them the best I can. Couponing gives us extras and makes my budget stretch but I balance couponing with family responsibilities. My kids always come first and ahead.
I really like that idea of hiring a teenager to clip your coupons. Sorting them and filing them in my binder is a chore for me. I may have to try that! Thanks! :0)
lol, I have been a SAHM, and I would almost consider myself a SAHM now (I’m only away from my son an hour or two of his waking hours a few times a week), and it is WAY easier for me now than when I was working FT. Have you been both a SAHM and a WOHM? Was it full time work? Do you cloth diaper? Just curious what your point of reference is.
I’m an empty nester & blogger, stayed at home with my kids until they were 14. But, like so many others I tried different things to make ends meet. Tupperware was hot then, I worked for an at home craft business blah…blah…I regret it all!! This is in no way meant to be mean, but, you are not a stay at home mom!! You are a work at home mom. There is a huge difference! Maintaining a website as big as yours is a huge task. I hope you have employees. You will have regrets no matter the road you choose when it comes to looking back on could I have done better for my kids. The question you should ask yourself is ..”Is the money worth the time lost? Does money enrich my family more than my time?” Just a thought. Have you read “The Proper Care & Feeding of Husbands?” You should…Thanks for all your hard W*O*R*K! I did not appreciate the huge task..until I started blogging myself….I think you’re crazier than me. Now go play ball with your family…We’ll be here when you get back.
I agree with everything you have said. I love “The Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands”. I highly recommend that book to everyone wife.
Already lots of responses so I’ll keep mine short. Whenever I’m burned out or we are really tight on money- I just don’t read the deals. I plan meals from what we already have and make due. If I don’t read the deals I don’t feel the guilt of ‘missing out’. Then a week or 2 later when I’m back at it I’m refreshed and think I pick and chose which deals I’m going to do it try to keep it simple!
I clip coupons during Desperate Housewives and Brothers & Sisters on Sunday nights. The kids are in bed at 8pm. Those 2 hours give me that quiet time to get everything cut and organized by store. I leave the house at 7:30 Monday Morning and get all my coupon shopping done by lunchtime. I reward myself with lunch or a Starbucks. The rest of the week, I do all the other SAHM jobs.
I am the same! I even took coupons to the beach with us, a free trip we received because my husband had to be there for a convention. I simply cannot stand the thought of missing a week or deals. I have even found myself buying things I would not have because they are such a good deal. (20 pairs of sunglasses) I also have been kept awake at night when there is a deal I MUST take advantage of. (Kellogg’s $17 catalina deal) I have been to Rite Aid 3 times this week already. I also have a little girl who keeps me up at night. I’m exhausted but I feel I have to. All this couponing actually has helped keep us on track being able to pay our bills because I have cut our grocery budget by $200/mo. I also have a part time job 20 hours per week that makes it even more stressful. I try to keep the house clean but it is always like a bomb went off in here. I am missing making dinners but I do spend tons of time with my kiddos. Any help on getting over missing a great deal would be appreciated. In fact, I have to return two Olay facial cleansers because I can’t find a 3rd one to make the $20 rebate deal! I’m not sure how Rite Aid handles that…do they charge me back the $10 +ups they gave me? My brain is rattled. Help!
Here’s what I do. First, I have a budget of $25 for each Wags, CVS and Rite Aid. Per month. I have a reloadable gift card for each, and when it’s empty, it’s done for the month. Second, I make up my lists of all the super awesome deals for each store and gather all the coupons I need for them. I then leave it alone until the next day. The next day I sit down with the lists, I look at what I have to spend in “free money” (RRs, UPs and ECBs) and check to see how much is left on the gift cards for each store. I then whittle the deals down to the best ones for ME. I ask myself, is this something I really want or can really use? Or is it something I can live without? I have fun playing around with my lists trying to get the most out of my “free money” and using less and less from the gift cards. Also, when I do my final scenarios I do my very best to not do any deal unless it’ll bring me back at LEAST the same amount of “free money” in the end! It takes some work to get started, but once you get the hang of it, it’s really easy!!! Hope it helps!!!
What a great idea with the gift cards. That’s so smart to stay on budget and it forces you to prioritize. Thanks for the tip!
What a great idea Robin. Not only can you stay on budget, you don’t have to carry any cash! Love it and will be getting cards tomorrow!
Keeping with the Gift card idea, at CVS they honor Riteaid and any other coupon for the Pharmacy, One per family per month. I transfer my prescription one time a month to a new pharmacy to earn between $10 & $25 a month. I just keep a few empty bottles at home so I don’t even have took up the phone number. Just read the phone numbers right off the label! This is my spending money for deals! 🙂
wow I must be tired or my wireless keypad is not keeping up! Please excuse the typos!
While couponing helps me to stay on track with my budget and is what allows me to stay home, I weigh a deal. Yes, the candy was an amazing deal last week, but I didn’t find out about it until Thursday PM, and had no way to get to the store. I thought about it, decided we already have plenty of candy for Hallowe’en, and that I don’t really need it. Once I “let a deal go” the first time, and gave myself permission to, it’s been easier to weigh the value of a deal, vs what I won’t get done at home.
What I have told friends who don’t have a lot of time is to just concentrate on one store or one kind of item. Choose your favorite grocery store and find coupons and deals for that store only. Or if you use a lot of diapers, just concentrate on diapers coupons and deals and forget all the others. You are empowering yourself and saving money but not overwhelming yourself.
I love to check your website everyday. However, I have deciplined myself to look for deals only after my duties at home have been done. Only then I get on the computer. If i really spot a good deal, before i jump on it,i ask myself, “Do I really need this or Do i really want it? ” 90% of the time I don’t need it and thus I can quickly move on to the next thing.
That’s what I do as well. And I don’t have a Rite Aid anywhere in the state, so I can skip those deals. I don’t ever go in CVS, actually I feel really weird the few times I do, because I work for Walgreens, xD. Walgreens deals are the only ones I do, along with Target occasionally. As don’t have any kids, but I’m trying to move out of my parents house, instead of weighing deals vs. spending time with kids, I weigh them versus moving out. Unless its something I will legitimately use, I don’t buy it. Some soap/shampoo/conditioner/lotion/cleaning supplies, etc I’ve been stocking up on somewhat, but for the most part, I just have a bunch of coupons that I clip, but may or may not use. A lot of times, I’ll clip out several different brands coupons, and wait to see a really great deal. Like laundry detergent, I have 3-4 different brands coupons, but I’ll only use one before the expire. xD
My family is constantly on the move, it seems every other weekend we’re taking short weekend trips to see friends or family nearby. My kids are always out and about during the week. We go to the park, sports practices etc etc. I’ve become a dork with my coupons because of this. I am never without my binder, several inserts, a gallon size baggie and scissors. All nicely tucked into a reusable shopping bag. Instead of sitting around during sports practice or while the kids are on the playground, I sit and clip coupons! I do one insert at a time, I cut the whole thing up, file the coupons into my binder as soon as they’re clipped, the ones I can’t use go into the plastic baggie to offer to others. I feel like I killed two birds with one stone. The kids get their things done, and I get my things done.
Plus, for my shopping trips, I try to do everything in one day. I’ll hit Rite Aid, Wags, CVS, and a grocery store all in one shot. I do my best to try and snag the “pantry staple” deals anywhere I can so in the event that I end up too tired for the grocery at the end of the trip, or if I end up with a sleepy 2 year old then I can just forget about. Or at the most just run in and buy what few things I need for the immediate future.
Hope it helps. But to be honest, I don’t think I’ll ever take a break from couponing. It gets frustrating and overwhelming at times, but it’s a way of life. My family and I have been able to do so many other things together in the past year that we wouldn’t have been able to afford without couponing. So in the end, when someone starts complaining that the coupons are taking over, I smile and point (or look at it myself!) to the calendar on the wall with the big red circle in December that says “Family Trip to Disney” and all is better.
I just do what I can! Clip coupons that apply to you your families needs. Just because there are coupons for free cat food dosen’t mean you need to go buy it. I know of someone who would buy things like this and she didn’t even have a cat!! I have a 13 month old who I need to spend more time with and I definitely need a break from couponing too. But I think I will wait until after the holidays because its important to me to get a good deal on Christmas presents. Just like another reader said, your kids are only yours for so long.
I love couponing and having 6 kids often makes it necessary. I take breaks though, like when school starts and things just get a little crazier than normal. During those busy times (or when I am just too tired) I will still look for deals at the store and buy the cheapest brands but I lay down the coupon binder for a while. Sometimes I miss it when I see something I know I had a great coupon for.
I go through seasons. I think all moms do. There are no perfect moms and we all strive to figure out how to do it best. It is different for all of us though. When something isn’t working, I just step back and seek wisdom for a solution. Then I adjust.
As fellow moms we should show each other lots of grace. Let’s not expect other moms to live up to perfection when we ourselves are not there yet. Oh, but if you are then please tell us all how you do it!
Oh, I understand! I am a stay at home mom- who understands that staying at home with the kiddos means constantly cleaning up after them, not necessarily having more time to clean! And on little sleep! You just need a schedule and some direction.
Here is what I do: Check the sites only twice a day. That’s it. Those babies deserve your attention more than you need another free bottle of shampoo!
Since your husband only works 5 days a week, have him watch the kids for an hour or two while you clip your coupons and put them away on Sunday. I also have envelopes in my binder for when I can clip them but don’t have time to put them away (dairy, produce, etc.). That way they are sorted.
Pick one day for grocery shopping, and one day for normal drugstore or other trips.
As for the household work, pick one activity per day. It’s impossible to stay in one room long enough to completely clean it when your kids are that little. So, make Monday a dusting day, Tuesdays clean your floors, laundry on wed., etc. Treat taking care of your homke the way you would an outside of the home job- Have a checklist of things that must get done.
You can do it! Just make sure you prioritize the right way. And, yes, there will be weeks when you just won’t make it to a store. So what. 🙂
I was actually able to take a break last year from OCT thru April. I shopped for perishable items that were on sale only. My stockpile allowed me to do that, and we lived normally. It was fun to get going again in April, and I feel more relaxed about picking and choosing the deals I want to get. I went a little crazy the first year I did coupon clipping, and now I’m more comfortable with knowing the deals will keep coming around! It’s liberating! It’s fun again!
I am a couponer “lite.” I have been couponing for about a year and it has NOT taken over my life and I’m able to live within a budget so much lower than I ever believed would be possible. I go through phases when I am very serious about acquiring coupons, compiling my deals, and making my shopping lists. I am married, work full time as a teacher and my two kids are teens. I do most of my shopping while my 13-year old son has sports practice after school (my daughter is 18 and usually drives herself). I get off work at 4 and he is usually busy until 5:30 so that’s when I do my shopping. We do get home late (after a 45-min drive home) but that’s life. I coupon HARD CORE when I have more time in the summer. I research deals for a couple of hours a day then – now it’s occasionally that I check up on what’s worth buying. Luckily, I have a decent stockpile so in the dry spells, I can get by within my $80 per week grocery budget!
My 18-year old daughter asked if I was going to give her a coupon binder for graduation. I thought she was giving me a hard time (the family enjoys teasing me about my passion about my deals) but she was serious. She said that she wants to “learn my ways” so she can get good stuff for pennies while she’s in college!
If time is short, Collin’s drug store lists are a lifesaver – I can scan and read only the red items ( the best buys) and see if I need to make that deal!!
I wish that I had the knowledge and skill to get such great deals when I spent so much on diapers and formula when my children were young. Now, when they are almost 14 and 18, they are happy to help me cut and file coupons and even help me shop. They sure do enjoy the free razors, toothbrushes, shampoo, acne medication, and CANDY!!!!
That is so cute. I think the coupon binder for graduation is the coolest gift EVER!
Wish I had thought of that for my daughter, tho I did get her a coupon accordian type folder. You could spread the word and it would be fun for your daughter to get money AND COUPONS in her graduation cards!! It would be like free toiletries for college!!!! wooohoooooo
For the past year I have let coupons, store sales and the internet control my life. We don’t have kids at home any more, but with my 2 part time jobs and my husband’s 3, there is never time for anything but work and coupons. I told my husband a couple weeks ago, that I had to realize that I can’t get every coupon and hit every sale. I am trying very hard to cut back. I feel like I’m slacking when I miss something, but I keep telling myself there is more to life than coupons. I am making time for my other passion (metal detecting) which I had almost given up. This is the first time I’ve been on the internet today, and hey, I don’t feel guilty. It actually feels good to take a whole day off to metal detect. Finding a balance is hard, but it’s something we all have to do.
I am a stay at home mom with a husband that is away for work 3 weeks out of every month. I mow the lawn, take the car to be fixed, keep up the house, feed the animals, and take care of my three year old among a million other things I am too tired to write. BUT, I love to sit down with my scissors and newspapers and clip away at all of those great coupons. I make couponing part of the “me” time that doesn’t really exist, but I have to believe in it to stay sane. I make some fresh brewed coffee and sit at my dining room table and open my coupon binder and organize while my son is sitting only a few feet away watching a favorite movie, and I don’t feel the least bit guilty! My son gets my attention the other 23 hours of the day, so I feel ok about spending some time lost in my couponing world. When my husband is home he knows that on Sundays I will be cutting coupons and he finds ways to entertain my son which allows them to bond as well. Couponing IS my break and on top of that I save us a bunch of money. It’s a win win if you ask me!
Finding balance is tough. I do not have balance at all, and i can get things quite disorganized in a short time so i do miss deals. I have three kids, a 13yr old with adhd, a 4yr old who is autistic, and a 2 yr old going through the terrible 2’s. Plus, a husband who works lots, lots of therapy for my son, and a house to keep up with. So yeah, i cannot do all the deals i would like to. Sometimes i forget to label the coupon booklets too. I don’t have the big chain grocery stores like Publix either. I try not to let it all get to me. Family time is so important because before too long, life will have passed you by and your kids will have grown. A deal is important but not more important than the little things we so often let pass us by. Unless you NEED the deal, it is not that big of a deal to miss one. There will be other deals, and probably really soon. I spend more on groceries, but someday my kids will not remember that. They’ll look back and see, my mom was there when i needed her. I love this site and i do try to check a few times a day, but i no longer let myself get upset if i miss a deal.
i have only been couponing for a few months, started at the end of may this year. i cannot imagine NOT trucking my binder along everywhere i go. when i first started i was SUPER SHOPPER. i would go to every store, every week, try to get every awesome deal there was to be gotten. if something popped up after i had already done my shopping i would go back. now that i have a HUGE, and i mean huge stock pile, and have had some less than great experiences at these stores, i dont go to walgreens or walmart unless there is a huge money maker or something that i absolutely need that is a great deal. sometimes i skip weeks at rite aid or cvs if i am too busy, or just to tired or lazy. the only place that i go to AT LEAST once a week, is GIANT EAGLE!!!!! i love giant eagle, double coupons, awesome sales, and catalina deals, stackable ecoupons, and i will never stop using coupons there! (unless they change something lol)
i also have 3 daughters, 7year old in 1st grade, 3 and 1 year old at home. i work full time as a nurse, but have awesome hours so i only typically work 2-12hr shifts every weekend, and i get a bonus 12 hours of pay each weekend bc i work them all. my hubby is a stay at home dad, and he likes to go with me. Soooo the night before i go shopping, i get all my deals printed, and get my coupons ready to go. we take my daughter to school, and then we spend practically the whole day shopping, then we go pick her up. then i have the other 4 days to spend with my girls!
Hi, yes its seems we all get a little out of balance with couponing, I got that way by the end of the summer. I had so many items my stock room was way unorganized, I literally could not get rid of the item fast enough. I didn’t even have time to clip for grocery shopping, Carring all my insert with me in the car in case I came across a great deal. But one day I decided to take a break, slow up. I stopped reading blog so much and the good thing was I’d get an email every evening. So I just would read those and when the deal was totally free and was less than $2.00 I would do that deal only. Another decision I made was which stores I really like to shop i.e. Which pharmacy out of the 3, which department store gave me the least hassle while using coupons, This slowed things down a little. So just step back and ask yourself some questions that will help you find a balance and then revise a plan that’s right for you.
What a wonderful topic Coleen, this is something that I have struggled with and still do from time to time. When I first started couponing I would devote 2-4 hours a day to it…way to long for a working mother. My house was falling to pieces, but more so I was falling to pieces. I was so obsessed with couponing it wasn’t even fun for me anymore. I would get so frustrated if I didn’t have a certain coupon or if I had to pay more than .20 cents for anything. I felt bound by my coupons and was riddled with guilt if I had to pay full price for anything. I was almost relieved when I became so busy with the purchase of our new house that I no longer had time to coupon. It ended up being almost four months before I returned to couponing, and to be honest with you I didn’t miss it nor did I really notice much of a difference in my monthly budget. I realized that couponing was a hobby of mine and not a requirement. I like to shop and couponing is a way to fill that need without actually spending my own money. Now I limit my couponing to only one store and the grocery store for things I’m already buying, and I try not to worry about all the deals I might be missing out on. Furthermore, I am so thankful for “Hip2Save” because I could never figure this all out on my own.
I AM A PART TIME STAY AT HOME MOM AND I TOO SOMETIMES STRUGGLE WITH THE GUILT OF BEING MARRIED TO MY COMPUTER. HERE IS HOW I LOOK AT IT…YOU COULD BE WORKING ALL DAY AND DROPPING YOUR KIDS OFF AND NOT SEEING THEM UNTIL DINNER. YOU ARE HOME, THEY KNOW THAT AND COUPONING FOR ME AT LEAST, HELPS KEEP ME HOME. AS MOMS WE ARE ALWAYS JUDGING OURSELVES. YOU ARE DOING THE BEST YOU CAN. DON’T BEAT YOURSELF UP.
That’s how I justify some of the guilt. Couponing is part of the reason I can afford to work PT instead of FT. I try to do most of my couponing either first thing in the AM while he’s eating breakfast/I have my coffee, or after he goes to bed or down for a nap. We’ve been eating a lot of whole foods lately, though, so my couponing has gone down a lot. Now, I feel guilty because I spend 75% of the day in the kitchen trying new, healthy recipes. Oh, Mommy guilt!! You can’t escape it!!
Also a SAHM….for me couponing is my ‘relief’….i get such a high from couponing that i love every minute of finding the deals. I spend all day with my kids so i enjoy relaxing and cutting coupons…it’s my ‘me’ time 🙂
I’ve been taking somewhat of a break lately. I try to keep up on diaper deals cuz having two in diapers is ridiculous, but otherwise, I’ve been trying to chill, and leaving a lot of deals unread and untouched. I’ve barely been to any of the drugstores lately, unless there’s a diaper deal. I’ve tried just to focus on buying food/groceries (mostly fruits, vegetables, dairy and bulk items like flour, rice, etc.) and putting more effort into healthy eating for my family. Which means much less time on the computer looking for deals…. But, H2S is still the one blog I catch up on every other day or so. 🙂 How long to take a break? Not sure. Until I feel ready, I guess. Until then, just trying to find my center….
I recently took 3-4 weeks and stopped clipping coupons. By shopping the store weekly sales or store brand items I was able to keep my grocery bills in check. It all became too overwhelming and it was such a relief not to always think “do I have a coupon for that?” Most of my coupons ended up expiring and I threw them away and started fresh. It was a much needed break.
What a GREAT discussion! I am also a SAHM, and when I began couponing I was addicted. I felt like I had to get every deal there was. I actually spent a lot more money than I did when I wasn’t using coupons. I would see a deal and grab the coupons and drag my 2 year old twins out and race to get that shaving cream or toothpaste. I would get back to the house sweating to death, and stressed out from dealing with my not so patient babies. I would be so proud of my stockpile though. It got old fast! You have to find that balance that works for you. I do check HIP2Save at least 4-7 times a day, just in case there is something that would benefit my family. I HATED clipping my coupons though. I would spend nearly all of my Sunday’s on the floor with my 5 Sunday papers. It wasn’t working for me. Now I have a filing cabinet filled with file folders. On each folder tab I have the date of the inserts. Do I miss deals when I am out and I don’t have my coupons OF COURSE. But was the time I spent with my family worth loosing out on free toothpaste? You bet! When I know about special deals I will clip those coupons and stick them in an envelope with the store name on it. I know all of you just gasped 🙂 The envelope way works for my though. I have more shaving cream, and razors, and toothpaste, and shampoos than I know what to do with. I have more cereal and junk food than my kids can consume. So you really just need to find what works for you. If you are overwhelmed with it, then cut back. One way will never work for everyone. Now if deals posted didnt have the date of the inserts, I would be in trouble!!!!
You’re preaching to the choir; I think we all go through coupon overload (maybe even Collin!) occasionally. I deal with it by taking a step back and really thinking about my purchases again, not just getting them because they’re a great deal. First, I check my stash. If I’m not running low on something, I can afford to let a great deal go by. (I think I have enough salad dressing to last until the next millenium, and I haven’t bought mustard in a year.)
Then I check the expirration dates on semi-perishables like cereal and crackers. If I’ve had them long enough for them to go stale, I’ve overbought, and don’t need to leap on every deal.
Next I take a good long look at what my family actually eats or uses. Free isn’t a deal if it just takes up space in the freezer till it grows ice crystals, and there’s a limit to how much shampoo I want to donate to the homeless shelter.
Finally, I look at the ads. If there’s one really good deal on at a store, and I NEED IT, I’ll make a trip. If I have enough of everything to get by for the week, I won’t go for just a few deals. It helps to know the sales cycles in your store – if something goes on BOGO every 6-8 weeks, I can wait. If it’s the best deal I’ve ever seen, I’ll jump.
When I’ve got coupon fatigue, I won’t clip and sort every coupon. For instance, cereal coupons are always there; print them as you need them. I won’t print maybes, and I’ll just collect the Sunday Qs in my coupon basket, flipping through them as I make a list. Yes, my organizer gets behind, and occasionally I’ve let it get so far behind that nearly EVERYTHING expires. It’s very freeing to simply dump it out and start over with fresh Qs! That usually ends coupon fatigue for me.
I don’t coupon near as much,p though I check this site several times daily. When I need something,I dont always have coupons for them. I go to Walmart,Kroger,shop sales and store brands and use what coupons I have. Sometimes I get behind on clipping and sorting…I dont have a binder,I have a wallet organizer. I would love to shave more off my budget, but I dont really know how to. So kind of at a stand still with money being so tight and taking it easy with the deals at the same time. If it isnt free,nearly free,a moneymaker,or a have-to-have,usually I leave it.
That being said,I am a 38 yr old mom of 17,12 and 10 yr old. I sell on ebay,keep a lil boy after school/take him to football prac. and drop him off, and most also keep him most Saturdays. Have 4 dogs which are like more kids. Have a hubby who works 40 hrs most wks,sometimes more. Turnarounds every now and then which can be 7 day a week 12 hr days at times. I handle our budget,hence the mess we are in…I thrift store shop,coupon shop ..and am considering becomin a Scentsy rep. LOL,need any more info? 😉 I love God and my family and trust Him to work it all out right.
I am a single mom of 2 kids who works 3 PT jobs. I coupon to survive I also am barely getting sleep because I dedicate the evenings after work to the kids & coupon when they are in bed every night. My kids are a little older(son is 11 daughter is 9) so whenever I feel overwhelmed with couponing I involve the kids, I have them help clip & organize. If my budget allows I let them choose 1 coupon each as a reward such as (favorite cereal, ice cream or maybe a soda) & I buy that for them as a thank you or if my budget doesn’t allow I let them pick out something from our “sample treasure chest.” The kids like feeling like they contribute to our family because they know we don’t have a ton of extra money to waste. I guess my point is that if couponing isn’t rewarding & fun anymore then I will take a break & I would not allow it to come in between the time my kids need me, its tough to balance it all out but if your overwhelmed then you should only do what you absolutely have to in order to survive.
Wow of all the commets I have read yours is the most inspiring! U are not complaining or whining just making it work! I also let my kids use most of my wags register rewards to buy “something special”! It’s all about the family and you just proved it!
1. Your children will be grown & gone before you realize it. Don’t miss out on today. The days may drag on, but the years fly by.
2. Make time for your children, not your house work. “Trying to clean the house while the children are young is like trying to shovel snow while it is still snowing.” (Quote from ?)
3. Don’t stress over a missed deal, or coupon, or sale. Just don’t! Another deal is just around the corner.
You will NEVER regret taking the time with your children. It pays off when they are adults!
I have to say every now and then I take all of my coupons and throw them in recycling because I feel so disorganized and how much toothpaste do I need and I don’t have time to chase around Walgreens and CVS and all the grocery stores. I think I am just sick of trying to organize all of this. Then I start fresh with the next Sunday insert and try again. I want to be so organized and I am not, my pantry is not stocked and the laundry is never done, etc. We are all a work in progress, play with those kids and cut some coupons later!! Luck and Love
Funny- Life must truly be all about perspective. Couponing is a hobby to me, not a chore. I do it to get a break from my other responsibilities, a 60 hr work week and full time masters program. i also love to remind myself that I can do more on less, it’s all about strategy and thinking outside the box. I love teaching my kids about frugal ways (brings back memories of me and my mom in the last recession :). You never know just when those life skills will come in handy for the next generation. Life is all about seasons, I do admit some are full of feirce couponing and lots of fun, others are strictly business, but at least I have the memories of those blissful days of clipping, and cutting, and bargain hunting!!
This is one of the best posts I’ve read on hip2save, for me personally. Really helpful comments! I agree with a poster who said that couponing fulfilled her need to shop, just without all the spending. And others who’ve said it’s like an addiction and a savings-high! Thanks also for reminders to discipline yourself to checking blogs after important things are done…surely I can do that. The internet in and of itself is a bit addicting and time wasting for me.
This is something that I especially struggle with, considering I’m a junior in high school and also am a blogger! I’ve decided that homework is to get done first, then checking on the deals and posting about them. 🙂
I am on board with people who say that kids come first – enjoy your time with them and your spouse. My husband and I noticed our priorities changed when our daughter was born – more family time, less cleaning time and since household chores used to be shared 50-50, no one feels guilty when things don’t get done.
At the same time, financial “health” of the family is important too so if couponing means you can provide better for the family – then you need to carve out time for that too. It will come down to what is more important – dusting or going out and getting the boxes of free pasta from Kroger and free shampoo from Walgreens.
I guess the right answer is balance and the right balance is different for each and every individual.
I recently took a three-week (involuntary) break from couponing since I had family in town and we were travelling so I missed the last PG insert weekend (I know, horrible!!!) and now I find it’s taking me a while to get back into it but I’m getting there. Thanks to this website it’s not to difficult fortunately. 🙂
I used to go to every store and get every free deal even if didn’t need it. I got a little burnt out and so I cut back. I don’t clip every coupon, only the ones I know I might possibly use. I rarely go to Walgreens because the register rewards are too complicated (I did go last week for the free Nivea after coupon!) If there aren’t enough good deals at CVS or Rite Aid to make it worth my time I don’t bother going. I find I will only shop for the deals and then come home and realize there was other stuff we actually needed but it wasn’t a great coupon deal. I have been trying harder to buy the stuff we need too even if sometimes it isn’t the best deal because I buy it at one of the stores I plan on going to shop for deals. It’s hard to balance and it’s just me and DH.
I took this past summer off! It was wonderful; I had my two girls home with me, the sun shining, pools to swim in, parks to visit, camping trips, lemonade stands, library visits, long walks and bike rides. With all that “wonderfulness” of summer who want to run to Walgreens, Rite Aid and Target everyday.
We lived off of the stockpile (I wanted to run it down to make sure nothing expired anyways). We maybe went to the store once every week or two for fresh fruit (veggies came from the garden) and a couple odds and ends.
Once school started again it was time to start over, which was difficult because for the first few weeks I didn’t have the coupons for the deals. But now all is back in order and I will begin to build another stockpile to get us through next summer 😉
Without having read the comments, but having read the post, I just want to say this:
Personally, for me, since I currently have no children of my own, but am unable to work, and at times, unable to get out of bed, this site has helped me to do something useful with my time!!!
At the same time though, do I only buy things that are on sale, or with coupons? Hell no!!! Why? b/c if I did I wouldn’t pay attention to my husband, I would ignore my friends, and neglect myself, and when I do have children (for for a few more years), I would have a hard time adjusting. So, I try to balance things through my relationship with Jesus Christ, he keeps me in check and reminds me that life isn’t about saving money, its about the relationships (relationship with Jesus, others, and self).
And if all I do is spend time on the comp and such scouring for coupons, I wont have a life b/c all I’ll have is myself at the end of the day. But if I trust God to give me the good sales when I need them, and if he so wishes, coupons too, he never fails. I would rather spend more money on something I WANT then “save” money on something I don’t need or want just b/c its “cheap”. That’s not saving at all, saving is not spending money, and if I really want to save money, I’m best off ignoring sales unless God tells me to go to them, so that’s what I do. 😀
God Bless ~Amy
I have been couponing for about 9 months now. In the beginning, I was neurotic about it and made sure I went to every drugstore plus Kroger, Target, Walmart, trying to snag every great deal that came along. My kids were 2.5 and 9 months old at the time, so I was also trying to do all this running around after they were in bed (hubby was at home of course). It was exhausting!!
I have finally learned a few things that have helped, the most important thing being that there will always be more deals next week. Some weeks, the drugstore deals aren’t that great or it’s something I’m already stocked on, like toothpaste or body wash, so I just don’t go. Some weeks I also skip the grocery store altogether and put the stock pile to good use. Yes, I hate skipping a week of drugstore shopping (scoring those freebies is addictive!!), but I can’t do everything. It ebbs and flows. My children will only be little once. When they’re in school full time in a couple years, I will be able to do much more. But for now, in this season of life and motherhood, I am thankful for the great coupon shopping weeks and try to overlook the weeks that aren’t so hot.
I agree that I coupon to tame a shopping addiction without breaking the bank- lol.
However, some weeks, it does get tiring, and I just want to go to the store and buy things without having to THINK about every little thing. I keep from getting too burnt out by focusing my “deal hunting” to Giant Eagle and CVS only. I only go to CVS if there are free things, MMs, or I have ECBs that are about to expire. I only go to GE when there are freebies/close to freebies. So, sometimes I go to both, sometimes one, sometimes neither.
In addition to the “bargain hunting”, If I need groceries but don’t feel like using coupons, I just go to Aldi or Marcs and stock up, while paying attention to prices. I can usually get a lot for very little if I just browse the aisles for sale prices. I buy a lot of cheap staples (flour, eggs, cheese) that I can make into almost everything.
I think taking one week off from couponing can be refreshing. I have also taken a fast from facebook. For one week I didn’t check it once! And I think instead of feeling like we have to check this blog every hour we could wait and only do it once during the day! And I think just cutting back a little bit will help you feel more on top of the rest of your life.
I spend Wednesday morning cutting and planning my shopping trip. Then I either go that afternoon or the next morning to do all my shopping. I can control the burn out by setting aside one day a week or two half days for couponing. I did take a few weeks off in August. With school starting, a death in the family, and three sets of company, I just could not do it. I actually found it refreshing! I loved just walking into the store and throwing anything I wanted into my cart. I said, “this is okay you have saved thousands already this year.” And when I find myself having another difficult time , I can say it’s okay to set couponing aside for a few weeks. Will I ever set it aside forever? Are you kidding! NO! I do my shopping and sorting while my daughter is in school and if she is home I leave her with dad. He loves how much I save and is more than happy to see me headed to the grocery store. Keep it fun don’t stress your self out or lose time with you kids over it.
Just a side note, all the people digging on this girl, I really don’t think she was complaining about anything, I felt the tone of her letter was “reflective”, meaning she was more or less contemplating her situation and realizing she was wasting time.
I too have done the daily grind of work, school, ect, not having my own children, but also watching other people’s children sometimes all day when I am not at school and work, and sometimes while I was at work b/c I worked in an arcade. So, I am grateful for what I have now, though I do desire to go back to work, I can’t do to health issues, but you know what, who cares? 🙂 I just try to enjoy where I am at. 😀
Anyway, after that side note. What I am trying to say is this; don’t be to hard on her, I just think she’s trying to find a balance, not complain about her life. Really. 🙂
So I give kudos to you girl for realizing this! You’ll be the better for it!!! And I highly recommend getting closer to Jesus. 😀 That will help a lot. 🙂 But you know, that’s up to you. 🙂
God Bless ~Amy
I have an addiction to couponing. At times it does consume my every thought. Tonight my husband wants to put a time limit on the computer.
Collin- A stay at home mom does not have a job! This is your job…working 7 days a week posting awesome deals for us!. You dont’ qualify under the SAHM. …you work out of your home big differnce!
I feel for this girl – balance is something that can be very difficult to obtain. And for me, couponing is my lowest priority. Mainly because I feel like the best way to save money is not to spend it! Honestly ask yourself, are you buying things that you really need? Or just things that are a really good price and you might be able to use? How many clothes do your kids or you need? How many snack foods? (Because honestly, the majority of food coupons are for foods that you can live without.) I only check this website if I’m looking for something specific that I need that I could use a good price on. I only coupon at food stores if I actually get a coupon I could use on something I’d normally eat. (I stick with fresh fruits and veggies and meat – and have only seen 2 coupons in my lifetime for fresh food.) It’s disheartening for me to hear of all these great deals people get, but I don’t use the kinds of things that they’re getting. I don’t need 100 toothpastes in storage – they do expire, you know. I don’t need a gift closet when I tend to give cheap puzzles or books (all under $5 at Walmart or Target), which the kids actually seem to enjoy. So ask yourself why you’re couponing. Are you really saving money when you’re spending it on things you don’t need? If the answer to that is yes, cut back. If you are couponing in order to save money on the things that you need, then make sure that you set aside a certain amount of time a day to “work”, because that’s what being a mom is. It’s work. And as you’d schedule appointments and meetings in a normal office workday, you need to schedule times in a mom workday. Time specifically for the kids. Time specifically for the house. And time specifically for finances, aka couponing. And give yourself time off as well. Dad gets to time out from work when he gets home. Where do you get a time out? 🙂 So set aside a certain amount of time for ‘finances’, then don’t go over it. That will help you prioritize and waste less time. And make sure you schedule more time for the more important things – like making sure you and your kids are happy. (And remember, the happiness from getting a good deal is fleeting. Which is why you keep going after the next good deal. The happiness from making awesome memories stays with you and your children forever. Which is why it’s so easy to put that aside.)
I do not cut up my coupon inserts. I mark the date on the front of the insert and file them in a file drawer by month and type. SS, RP, P&G. Then when Collin posts a great deal, I just pull that insert and cut it out. Now I know that sometimes I am at the store and I know I have a coupon for something that is on clearance at home and I miss out. If that happens, I may just buy it and then bring the coupon back later, or I pass it up. But that only happens less than once a month. I figure it is worth missing a few things like that as a trade off for not having to cut out coupons every single week.
Over the summer when my kids were home, I did almost no deals. At the end of the summer I realized that I made it for almost 3 months living off my stash. I only had to buy fresh fruits and vegetables, milk and bread. It was very liberating and I am sure I saved a lot of money.
I am posting this anonymously because that is because I am ready for a meeting. I am addicted to couponing. I work full time and don’t get home until 7. I try to think of reasons I don’t have to go right home so i can go do a deal. I buy stuff for people…most without paying me. Most are out of work so I try to help out. My husband thinks I am sick. I am really tired because I was up late last night reading blogs but I would love to go do a few cat deals. I have coupons and books all over my car, my Sunday coupons are not stacked and haven’t clipped for the week yet. This is stressing me out. I think I need a break…or therapist! I told my sister I was going to stop as soon as I get 100 rolls of paper towels and 1000 rolls of tp
I am a SAHM of one and another due next month. I have taken weeks off before. When I started clipping 2 years ago I thought I HAD to get every deal possible, then realized that I was overstocking on items we really don’t have a need for as quickly as it would go bad. I have not bought shampoo in over a year, and probably have another year’s supply still left (just one example). I had my MIL move in with us while she was going through Chemo and radiation treatments for about 6 months. At that time I really changed my couponing. I learned that I could live with out every deal. In fact I took about 3 months off. I did not use one coupon, but I also had so much stocked up that I really didn’t need a lot of staple items, just fresh foods and meats. To this day I will pass up deals so that I can spend that extra time with my daughter and husband.
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I am relieved to see I am not alone. I took the summer off too. I used to use a binder but now I save the inserts and file them. I cut after I read the matchups. I save so much time that way. I was just saying how a couple of good walgreens deals finally got me back into couponing. I have such a stockpile of beauty items, I could probably live off of it for a year. I found such relief going to the grocery and just buying what we needed and not worrying about a coupon. It is so freeing sometimes to just shop, and plan menus for what you actually feel like eating vs what is on sale!
Wow. I came on here to read helpful tips about how to balance your time and found the age old arguement about SAHM’s vs. Working Mom’s. It really makes me sick. Everything turns into the same arguement time and time again. Why can’t we love and respect each other as women and be able to reach out to each other without feeling like we are going to be judged for either working or staying at home? Both jobs are hard! And they are jobs we love! We all love our children and our families and they are the reason why we do anything – work, not work, coupon, manage finances, etc, etc. One way is not better than the other and one is not harder than the other.
I recently quit my job to stay at home with my daughter. I hate it when I hear of how “lucky” I am. I am fortunate yes, but not lucky – I work hard to be able to stay at home with her. I sacrifice a lot and do without a lot. When I was working, I could treat myself to things or we could go out to dinner occasionally, etc. But those are sacrifices I knew I was making and very willingly.
I just wish we could all support each other and not play the “my job is harder game”. It really makes you all sound very childish.